Naturally these societies degenerate into savagery. They have no function for their form to follow. When the things you do have real effects, it's no longer enough just to be pleasing. It starts to be important to get the right answers, and that's where nerds show to advantage. Bill Gates will of course come to mind. Though notoriously lacking in social skills, he gets the right answers, at least as measured in revenue.
The other thing that's different about the real world is that it's much larger. In a large enough pool, even the smallest minorities can achieve a critical mass if they clump together. Out in the real world, nerds collect in certain places and form their own societies where intelligence is the most important thing. Sometimes the current even starts to flow in the other direction: sometimes, particularly in university math and science departments, nerds deliberately exaggerate their awkwardness in order to seem smarter.
John Nash so admired Norbert Wiener that he adopted his habit of touching the wall as he walked down a corridor. As a thirteen-year-old kid, I didn't have much more experience of the world than what I saw immediately around me. The warped little world we lived in was, I thought, the world. The world seemed cruel and boring, and I'm not sure which was worse. Because I didn't fit into this world, I thought that something must be wrong with me. I didn't realize that the reason we nerds didn't fit in was that in some ways we were a step ahead.
We were already thinking about the kind of things that matter in the real world, instead of spending all our time playing an exacting but mostly pointless game like the others. We were a bit like an adult would be if he were thrust back into middle school.
He wouldn't know the right clothes to wear, the right music to like, the right slang to use. He'd seem to the kids a complete alien. The thing is, he'd know enough not to care what they thought. We had no such confidence. A lot of people seem to think it's good for smart kids to be thrown together with "normal" kids at this stage of their lives.
But in at least some cases the reason the nerds don't fit in really is that everyone else is crazy. I remember sitting in the audience at a "pep rally" at my high school, watching as the cheerleaders threw an effigy of an opposing player into the audience to be torn to pieces.
I felt like an explorer witnessing some bizarre tribal ritual. If I could go back and give my thirteen year old self some advice, the main thing I'd tell him would be to stick his head up and look around. I didn't really grasp it at the time, but the whole world we lived in was as fake as a Twinkie. Not just school, but the entire town. Why do people move to suburbia? To have kids! So no wonder it seemed boring and sterile. The whole place was a giant nursery, an artificial town created explicitly for the purpose of breeding children.
Where I grew up, it felt as if there was nowhere to go, and nothing to do. This was no accident. Suburbs are deliberately designed to exclude the outside world, because it contains things that could endanger children.
And as for the schools, they were just holding pens within this fake world. Officially the purpose of schools is to teach kids. In fact their primary purpose is to keep kids locked up in one place for a big chunk of the day so adults can get things done. And I have no problem with this: in a specialized industrial society, it would be a disaster to have kids running around loose. What bothers me is not that the kids are kept in prisons, but that a they aren't told about it, and b the prisons are run mostly by the inmates.
Kids are sent off to spend six years memorizing meaningless facts in a world ruled by a caste of giants who run after an oblong brown ball, as if this were the most natural thing in the world.
And if they balk at this surreal cocktail, they're called misfits. Life in this twisted world is stressful for the kids. And not just for the nerds. Like any war, it's damaging even to the winners. Adults can't avoid seeing that teenage kids are tormented. So why don't they do something about it? Because they blame it on puberty. The reason kids are so unhappy, adults tell themselves, is that monstrous new chemicals, hormones , are now coursing through their bloodstream and messing up everything.
There's nothing wrong with the system; it's just inevitable that kids will be miserable at that age. This idea is so pervasive that even the kids believe it, which probably doesn't help. Someone who thinks his feet naturally hurt is not going to stop to consider the possibility that he is wearing the wrong size shoes.
I'm suspicious of this theory that thirteen-year-old kids are intrinsically messed up. If it's physiological, it should be universal. Are Mongol nomads all nihilists at thirteen? I've read a lot of history, and I have not seen a single reference to this supposedly universal fact before the twentieth century.
Teenage apprentices in the Renaissance seem to have been cheerful and eager. They got in fights and played tricks on one another of course Michelangelo had his nose broken by a bully , but they weren't crazy.
As far as I can tell, the concept of the hormone-crazed teenager is coeval with suburbia. I don't think this is a coincidence. I think teenagers are driven crazy by the life they're made to lead.
Teenage apprentices in the Renaissance were working dogs. Teenagers now are neurotic lapdogs. Their craziness is the craziness of the idle everywhere. When I was in school, suicide was a constant topic among the smarter kids. No one I knew did it, but several planned to, and some may have tried. Mostly this was just a pose. Like other teenagers, we loved the dramatic, and suicide seemed very dramatic. But partly it was because our lives were at times genuinely miserable.
Bullying was only part of the problem. Another problem, and possibly an even worse one, was that we never had anything real to work on. Humans like to work; in most of the world, your work is your identity. And all the work we did was pointless , or seemed so at the time.
At best it was practice for real work we might do far in the future, so far that we didn't even know at the time what we were practicing for. More often it was just an arbitrary series of hoops to jump through, words without content designed mainly for testability. The three main causes of the Civil War were Test: List the three main causes of the Civil War.
And there was no way to opt out. The adults had agreed among themselves that this was to be the route to college. The only way to escape this empty life was to submit to it. Teenage kids used to have a more active role in society.
In pre-industrial times, they were all apprentices of one sort or another, whether in shops or on farms or even on warships. They weren't left to create their own societies. They were junior members of adult societies. Teenagers seem to have respected adults more then, because the adults were the visible experts in the skills they were trying to learn. Now most kids have little idea what their parents do in their distant offices, and see no connection indeed, there is precious little between schoolwork and the work they'll do as adults.
And if teenagers respected adults more, adults also had more use for teenagers. After a couple years' training, an apprentice could be a real help. Even the newest apprentice could be made to carry messages or sweep the workshop. Now adults have no immediate use for teenagers. They would be in the way in an office.
So they drop them off at school on their way to work, much as they might drop the dog off at a kennel if they were going away for the weekend. What happened? We're up against a hard one here. The cause of this problem is the same as the cause of so many present ills: specialization. As jobs become more specialized, we have to train longer for them. Kids in pre-industrial times started working at about 14 at the latest; kids on farms, where most people lived, began far earlier.
Now kids who go to college don't start working full-time till 21 or With some degrees, like MDs and PhDs, you may not finish your training till Teenagers now are useless, except as cheap labor in industries like fast food, which evolved to exploit precisely this fact. In almost any other kind of work, they'd be a net loss. But they're also too young to be left unsupervised. Someone has to watch over them, and the most efficient way to do this is to collect them together in one place.
Then a few adults can watch all of them. If you stop there, what you're describing is literally a prison, albeit a part-time one. The problem is, many schools practically do stop there. The stated purpose of schools is to educate the kids. But there is no external pressure to do this well. And so most schools do such a bad job of teaching that the kids don't really take it seriously-- not even the smart kids. Much of the time we were all, students and teachers both, just going through the motions.
In my high school French class we were supposed to read Hugo's Les Miserables. I don't think any of us knew French well enough to make our way through this enormous book.
Like the rest of the class, I just skimmed the Cliff's Notes. When we were given a test on the book, I noticed that the questions sounded odd. They were full of long words that our teacher wouldn't have used. Where had these questions come from? From the Cliff's Notes, it turned out.
The teacher was using them too. We were all just pretending. There are certainly great public school teachers. The energy and imagination of my fourth grade teacher, Mr. Mihalko, made that year something his students still talk about, thirty years later. But teachers like him were individuals swimming upstream. They couldn't fix the system. In almost any group of people you'll find hierarchy.
When groups of adults form in the real world, it's generally for some common purpose, and the leaders end up being those who are best at it. The problem with most schools is, they have no purpose. But hierarchy there must be. And so the kids make one out of nothing. We have a phrase to describe what happens when rankings have to be created without any meaningful criteria.
We say that the situation degenerates into a popularity contest. And that's exactly what happens in most American schools. Instead of depending on some real test, one's rank depends mostly on one's ability to increase one's rank.
It's like the court of Louis XIV. There is no external opponent, so the kids become one another's opponents. When there is some real external test of skill, it isn't painful to be at the bottom of the hierarchy.
A rookie on a football team doesn't resent the skill of the veteran; he hopes to be like him one day and is happy to have the chance to learn from him. The veteran may in turn feel a sense of noblesse oblige. And most importantly, their status depends on how well they do against opponents, not on whether they can push the other down. Court hierarchies are another thing entirely. This type of society debases anyone who enters it. There is neither admiration at the bottom, nor noblesse oblige at the top.
It's kill or be killed. This is the sort of society that gets created in American secondary schools. And it happens because these schools have no real purpose beyond keeping the kids all in one place for a certain number of hours each day. What I didn't realize at the time, and in fact didn't realize till very recently, is that the twin horrors of school life, the cruelty and the boredom, both have the same cause. The mediocrity of American public schools has worse consequences than just making kids unhappy for six years.
It breeds a rebelliousness that actively drives kids away from the things they're supposed to be learning. Like many nerds, probably, it was years after high school before I could bring myself to read anything we'd been assigned then. And I lost more than books. I mistrusted words like "character" and "integrity" because they had been so debased by adults. As they were used then, these words all seemed to mean the same thing: obedience.
The kids who got praised for these qualities tended to be at best dull-witted prize bulls, and at worst facile schmoozers. If that was what character and integrity were, I wanted no part of them.
The word I most misunderstood was "tact. I assumed it was derived from the same root as "tacit" and "taciturn," and that it literally meant being quiet. I vowed that I would never be tactful; they were never going to shut me up. In fact, it's derived from the same root as "tactile," and what it means is to have a deft touch. Tactful is the opposite of clumsy. I don't think I learned this until college. Nerds aren't the only losers in the popularity rat race.
Nerds are unpopular because they're distracted. There are other kids who deliberately opt out because they're so disgusted with the whole process. Teenage kids, even rebels, don't like to be alone, so when kids opt out of the system, they tend to do it as a group.
At the schools I went to, the focus of rebellion was drug use, specifically marijuana. The kids in this tribe wore black concert t-shirts and were called "freaks.
Freaks were on the whole smarter than other kids, though never studying or at least never appearing to was an important tribal value. I was more in the nerd camp, but I was friends with a lot of freaks. They used drugs, at least at first, for the social bonds they created. It was something to do together, and because the drugs were illegal, it was a shared badge of rebellion. I'm not claiming that bad schools are the whole reason kids get into trouble with drugs.
After a while, drugs have their own momentum. No doubt some of the freaks ultimately used drugs to escape from other problems-- trouble at home, for example. But, in my school at least, the reason most kids started using drugs was rebellion. Fourteen-year-olds didn't start smoking pot because they'd heard it would help them forget their problems. They started because they wanted to join a different tribe. Misrule breeds rebellion; this is not a new idea.
And yet the authorities still for the most part act as if drugs were themselves the cause of the problem. The real problem is the emptiness of school life. We won't see solutions till adults realize that. The adults who may realize it first are the ones who were themselves nerds in school.
Do you want your kids to be as unhappy in eighth grade as you were? I wouldn't. Well, then, is there anything we can do to fix things? Almost certainly. There is nothing inevitable about the current system. It has come about mostly by default. Adults, though, are busy. Showing up for school plays is one thing. Taking on the educational bureaucracy is another. Perhaps a few will have the energy to try to change things. I suspect the hardest part is realizing that you can.
Nerds still in school should not hold their breath. Maybe one day a heavily armed force of adults will show up in helicopters to rescue you, but they probably won't be coming this month. Get comfortable with asking questions and being wrong.
The quest for knowledge includes wrong turns and realizing that you don't know. Focus less on "What do I know? Part 2. Lose yourself in your passion. Nerds get the reputation for being in the clouds half the time because their minds are wandering, probing distant places or complex correlations and equations.
For this reason, don't be afraid to be aloof, if that's who you are. Lose yourself in the intellectual areas that make you happy and help you feel connected to the world, even if it means you seem disconnected by the "depth" and "displacement" involved in your internalizing a singular passion.
Your passion could be anything, from cryptology to philosophy to Norse mythology to philately. Whatever it is, make it a blast! Set short- and long-term goals for yourself. The sooner you set yourself some goals perhaps in an outline of variable and constant parameters, a rubric, or a protocol , the easier it will be to achieve them.
Setting absorbing goals has the benefit of being especially nerdy! Don't be afraid to go beyond the ordinary. Think differently. Don't be afraid to tackle an idea or activity that isn't popular. Realize that you may not have a great grasp of what is popular and what isn't in the first place. No matter! If you found that lining your car antenna with aluminum foil gives you better reception on the AM stations in your car, then go for it. A nerd does not care how their car looks if the radio station is playing properly.
If you propose to test all your friends for an antibody not yet known to science, then go for it with your friends' consent. A nerd does not care whether the world doubts their methods and challenges their findings. If you are interested in computer viruses and want to tell all your friends what a trojan is, then go for it!
A lot of nerds like to learn about things that seem pointless to others. Always keep learning. A nerd is on a constant quest for knowledge. A nerd doesn't always care whether the information they receive has any utility. The mere fact that it's simple, profound, or counter-intuitive is enough to make it cool. Read voraciously. Read everything in your area s of interests that you can get your hands on, including reference books and encyclopedias.
Read and watch the news enough everyday to be informed about what's going on beyond your community. Read fiction books, too, because they can help build your vocabulary and gives you a good sense of spelling.
Read things that you like, but your parents don't approve of. Take regular trips to the library. If you can't go physically, try checking out e-books.
Read a variety of nonfiction and fiction books. Nonfiction teaches you new things. Fiction teaches you new perspectives. Look for books about people who are different from you, such as people of different cultures, races, or disabilities. Also check out books that tackle major social issues.
Study related languages. Try to pick up a language just for kicks; or maybe because a subject your learning about has original sources in the native tongue. Experiment with web-based translation machines. If you feel that learning a language is too hard, then try and learn Pig Latin. Pig Latin has a set of rules to go by in order to speak it, so it is very easy to learn. Extra cred goes to nerds who study a "dead" or fictional language, such as Cuman, Eyak, and Karankawa, or Elvish, Dothraki, or Klingon.
Pay attention in school. Try to get a seat where you can clearly hear, see the teacher and chalkboard, and pay attention. A good goal to set for yourself is to try getting mostly As in everything you do at school, including homework. Take notes, study for that test, and focus. Most of all, come to school ready to learn and try not to worry about the social scene too much if it's uninteresting or uncomfortable.
Try some extracurricular activities, such as robotics or math club, chess, or drama. Try to balance your extracurriculars so that they don't bring your grades down. Ask a lot of questions in class. There is no such thing as a stupid question, remember? The only stupid question is the question you didn't ask. Do research above and beyond what is taught in class. Don't be afraid to look into online learning or get a tutor if you're struggling with a certain subject area.
Everyone has certain subjects that don't come easily to them. Your school may offer free tutoring resources. Channel any difficult feelings you may have into your passions.
Nerds deal with their anger and heartbreak in a productive way: they think very carefully and logically about what to do or say, or amend changes to their debate presentation before they lash out at other people. Don't cut yourself down. What other people say about you isn't necessarily who you are. Just don't pay attention to what they say about the way you are. Take care of your body. Make sure you take proper care of your body. Here are some things that help you stay sharp: Eat a healthy diet.
Establish a regular sleep schedule. As a nerd, your brain is one of your biggest assets in life, so you should take care of it. Exercise regularly. Brush your teeth. Regular tooth-brushing improves longevity and reduces a surprising amount of health risks. Maintain good hygiene. It's a common stereotype for nerds to have multiple allergies or health issues. If you do have any specific allergies or other health issues, stay on top of all of your medications.
For example, if you have asthma, make sure you have your inhaler with you at all times in case of an attack. Be an optimist.
You're a nerd and you know it. But you're also willing to be optimistic. You like who you are, even if it doesn't seem like very many other people do. That's okay, they simply don't understand you.
The friends that you do have are good people who make you feel like you want to be alive. It may not always be easy. Life can be tough, but you can be equally tough. Nerds are resilient in challenging situations, willing to get up and keep going despite being knocked down. If optimism feels impossible, that's a sign of a problem. A nerd doesn't keep trying the same things if it's clear they aren't working. Find ways to change your life to be more advantageous to your success and well-being.
Consult a counselor or doctor if needed; they are experts, after all. Part 3. Looking like a nerd can help other nerds identify you, so you shouldn't have to worry too much about your fashion sense. A nerd prizes comfort over style, so if it so happens that you love wearing sweatpants, then embrace it! Consider practicality. Pull long hair back out of your face.
Wear clothes that don't itch and are good for walking, sitting, and running. Look for clothes that have nerdy patterns, like plaid, argyle, or pinstripes. You can wear such patterns on your shirts, jackets, sweaters, or even your pants.
Bring a sweater to tie around your waist if needed. This way, you'll be prepared for variable temperatures. If you're a female, only wear high heels if you can walk and run confidently in them.
If you want to be taller, stick with kitten heels or platform shoes; a significant heel can cause foot damage and is definitely not practical. Shoes that nerds are commonly associated with wearing are Chuck Taylor All-Stars, loafers, dress shoes, and orthopedic shoes. Measure your feet before you go shoe shopping. You want to make sure the shoes you buy give your feet plenty of support and comfort, and also room for you to wiggle your toes.
If you have foot problems like flat feet, meet up with a podiatrist to have your feet examined. Colored pants are a staple of the nerdy style. You can wear any pants you like, but only wear ones that are comfortable for you.
Popular color choices include olive green, maroon, brown, gray, mustard yellow, and navy blue. Khakis are a classic choice if colored pants aren't your thing. Chino pants are a more casual alternative if you don't like wearing khakis. Use your shirts to make nerd references or jokes. Look for ones that make you chuckle or smile. Math jokes, or obscure topics binary code, Latin, etc. Try using T-shirts to advertise your interest in your favorite video games, movies, books, or TV shows.
This may attract new nerdy friends who like the same things. Try on button-down shirts, long-sleeved or short-sleeved ones. You can wear it in a solid color or with a pattern. To appear dressier, wear a tie and keep the shirt buttoned up all the way. Polo shirts are a more casual alternative if button-down shirts aren't your thing. Wear glasses if you need them. Glasses are the best because they not help you see better, which is good for your overall health, but they're also the defining staple of the nerdy style, so they'll help increase your nerd quotient drastically.
Find a pair of glasses you like, and you'll get used to wearing them in no time. Because nerds aren't into fashion statements, wearing fake glasses isn't really a nerd thing.
Geeks and hipsters sometimes do this. Sport ill-fitting clothes if desired. Nerds are infamous in the fashion world for wearing clothes that don't flatter their body type and are rather anachronistic, probably because their clothes are hand-me-downs.
So if you're going for the nerd look, choose your wardrobe by lottery instead of carefully fitting the outfit together. Some nerds go for the disheveled look by accident or choice. There's nothing wrong with this as long as you're showered and clean. Dress preppy. Some nerds, but not all, have the preppy look on lock-down. A button-down shirt tucked-in, of course , a vest, chino pants, and loafers, with a hint of messiness to tie it all together. Especially when worn during informal occasions, this style will get you pegged for a nerd in no time.
Part 4. Be friendly. A nerd may be very smart, but he or she never looks down on anyone who isn't as smart as he or she is. Haters attract haters, so be friendly, polite, respectful, and easygoing with everyone around you, whether they are a jock, a valley girl, or anyone who has an intellectual disability. Sometimes, correcting others hurts more than it helps. If a person is sensitive or in a bad mood, or if the situation isn't good, let it slide.
With the exception of health issues, of course. If you know that a person prefers to be corrected, discreetly correct them and don't make it a big deal. If you're often shy or asocial, you're not alone; lots of nerds are! There's lots of places for people devoted to nerdy interests, like comic book stores and conventions, so check them out if you're looking for fellow nerds to befriend.
If you should find a nerd getting bullied or snubbed by his or her non-nerdy peers, offer him or her support. Invite him or her to hang out with you so you can get to know each other better. Use the right words. Nerds are usually pretty good with words because they care about getting things right. It doesn't hurt that they may read more in a month than the average American reads in a year. Nerds use the right word given the context. Sometimes, the right word happens to be a big one.
Very smart nerds have the ability to use incredibly basic words to explain incredibly complex subject matter. Make the dictionary and thesaurus your friend. Whenever you come across a word you don't know, consult the dictionary. Whenever you believe you could be using a better word given the circumstances, consult a thesaurus. Skip the overly complex or obscure words if you're talking to a child or someone with a limited vocabulary. The point of communication is to share ideas, not make the other person feel inferior.
Recognize that prioritizing other things doesn't mean someone is unintelligent or boring. Some people who love to style hair are interested in the chemistry that is used to make hair products. Some football players love the theatre and acting. While it's nice to be friends with a fellow nerd, you shouldn't judge non-nerdy people for not being "smart. They still could be interesting in other ways, and you never know what you could learn from them. Seek good, wholesome fun.
Nerds don't typically rely upon excitement and danger; we prefer more wholesome activities such as LAN parties , watching science fiction or fantasy films, collecting things like comic books, rocks and minerals, vintage computers, or film paraphernalia or building and launching a rocket.
You can enjoy such activities alone independence can be good or with your new nerdy friends the more the merrier! Be cautious about alcohol, especially if you are underage. This can impair your judgment and could harm your ability to recognize harmful or dangerous activities. Say "no thanks" if anyone offers you drugs. Find friends with similar interests.
While geeks often navigate between social groups, nerds are more likely to associate with other nerds, because of common interests. Maybe if you're an abstract thinker, try to find a nerd who's more practical or technical, and vice versa. The web is increasingly becoming an important social community for nerds, mainly because of its focus on free expression and its utility as platform for technology.
Don't be afraid to branch out to non-nerdy friends too. They have their own values and interesting perspectives. Luna Rose. That's up to you! Many nerds like those things, but that doesn't necessarily make you a nerd. The label of "nerd" is something you claim for yourself because you like it and you think it fits. Regardless of whether you like the idea of being a nerd, interests in art, reading, and learning are excellent things.
Keep pursuing them! Not Helpful 5 Helpful I am friends with a lot of people considered "nerds" and I want to be a nerd like them, but I don't know how I should talk. Should I be quieter?
Or should I talk constantly? Please help! Some nerds are quiet, some nerds are talkative, and some are in between. Don't worry so much about how much you "should" talk. Speak up when you think you have something worth saying, and stop to listen when you want to focus on someone else's ideas. Nerds share their unique ideas and they also listen and learn from other people. Use your best judgment and don't worry too much about it. Being a "nerd" is a label you give yourself.
Having intelligence doesn't necessarily make you a nerd, though it is a common "nerdy" trait. See if you think being called a "nerd" seems fitting for you. Not Helpful 0 Helpful Anyone can go barefoot if they so please, including nerds, though going barefoot isn't often associated with nerds. Not Helpful 17 Helpful No - you don't need to wear glasses to be a nerd, and not all nerds wear glasses. Nerds are usually associated with glasses, but some nerds wear contacts or don't have problems with their vision at all.
Not Helpful 2 Helpful There is no certain food that is associated with nerds. Everyone's food preferences are different. Not Helpful 7 Helpful Does someone have to go to college to be a true nerd? Can nerds go to trade school? Nerds don't necessarily have to go to college.
Many nerds choose to go to college to continue their education and study their passion, but they're more than welcome to go to trade school instead or to end their education after high school.
Not Helpful 3 Helpful Why do nerds have health problems like allergies, nosebleeds, asthma, or motion sickness? Being a nerd doesn't give you health problems, and having health problems doesn't make you a nerd. Nerds may be depicted as having certain health problems in the media, but many nerds do not have these health problems at all, it's just a stereotype with no foundation. Why are nerds are associated with health problems, such as allergies, asthma, foot odor, nosebleeds, motion sickness, etc.?
This is a media stereotype that isn't necessarily true. Health problems can happen to anyone. Some writers decide to give nerdy characters physical problems to emphasize that they are strong in mind but weak in body. But nerds are a diverse group, including strong people, people with disabilities, people with many serious health conditions, and people who are perfectly healthy. Since nerds generally pursue intellectual activities, they might have less time for physical activity. But every nerd is different, so don't take the stereotypes too seriously.
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